Hollow Heart

I’ve been feeling this hollow heart since the first time I did sonogram with nothing found on my womb (except damn persistent follicle whatsoever). Hollow. So this hollow heart keeps longing and searching for something. And this hollow heartย is also super fickly.

Indeed.

One day I could have the urging feeling to get a new pair of glasses. Bought it. Then the next day I felt it did not fit me at all. That my old glasses looked so much better on me. Then another day, I would make appointment with my former Obgyn in Singapore. Getting all upset when I did not receive immediate reply from the staff. Mentioning about my second miscarriage. Received appointment date. Booked all ticket and hotel for me and hubby. Then again the uncertainty strikes back. Do I really need to see another doctor? What if he suggesting another cycle of Clomid and Metformin or even IVF as an option? Would it be more confusing rather than just stay with one doctor’s opinion?

If only a pair of new glasses could fill my hollow heart. Things would get so much easier. I will try to live my life on day to day basis, because apparently the Two-Week-Wait has changed to Three-Month-Wait (if not longer – which I hope NOT!).

Note: Betta HcG test came back okay (it was 0.7 – as my obgyn suggested it should be below 5). I stopped taking Blackmores Conceive Well Gold, because I felt it cause some breakouts, so today I shifted back to Elevit. Just made a mental note to eat more spinach and salmon regularly to change the Omega 3 supplement, which was not provided by Elevit.

 

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2 thoughts on “Hollow Heart

  1. I’m subscribing to your blog and I believe one day it will turn into a novel with a happy ending..๐Ÿ˜„ and the sequel will be about how to deal with cranky babies and baby blues..๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š just never lose faith, God’s plan is much bigger than ours.. it will always be beautiful in His time.. ๐Ÿ’ช๐Ÿป๐Ÿ’ช๐Ÿป๐Ÿ’ช๐Ÿป

    Like

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